Give Yourself The Gift Of Happiness This Christmas.
Where I started
There was a time in my life when I was deeply depressed, frightened, overwhelmed…you name it. Not a pleasant situation to be in, to say the least. No help was available. The therapists I was dealing with were not supportive or constructive. This was back in the early ‘70s, when perhaps therapy had not evolved to the standards we have today.
I was in a foreign country with no friends or family I could rely on. I subsequently found out, when I reached out to family, that they weren’t people I could depend on anyway, which dug me deeper into my helplessness. The gift of happiness was very far from my reach.
Then, I realised it was all up to me to get me out of this pickle. But how? In the state I was in at the time, I had little clarity and even less strength. I knew I was becoming bitter, cynical, angry—but I didn’t know how to stop it.
It was up to me to deliver the gift of happiness to myself, but I had no idea how to start.
How we are guided towards the gift of happiness.
An idea floated to the surface of the mess in my mind. By the way, that’s how inspiration from your spirit guides, or whatever higher power you might consider exists, often comes.
I recalled a children’s book called Pollyanna. This is the story of a 12-year-old orphan in mid-west America. In the orphanage, the only Christmas gifts the kids received were everyone else’s cast-offs, which arrived in huge sacks dumped at the orphanage. Kids would rush to the sack to get whatever they could, broken or not. They would then trade with another kid to get a gift they preferred.
One day, Pollyanna got to the sack a bit late. There was nothing left but a pair of crutches.
Of course she was disheartened. No Christmas present this year.
From what I recalled of the story, the fellow who ran the orphanage said to her: ‘You can be glad you don’t need the crutches. That’s your gift.’ (Something like that, anyway.)
Pollyanna developed what she called ‘The Glad Game’. If the sun shines, you can be glad you can go out and play. If it rains, you can be glad you have a chance to curl up and read your book.
I decided to pinch the idea and play my own Glad Game.
Whatever was going on in my life, I determined to find things to be glad about. Although I had fallen in a deep hole—I could be glad I had a chance to evaluate my life. I could start to figure out my own way to the gift of happiness.
If I had no one to depend on, I could be glad I was learning independence. I could be glad for every little way I found to improve things, just for today. Just for now.
Looking back, I’m glad for what happened.
Although I was in the worst place, and, let me tell you, it lasted longer than I expected, but—
- I’m glad my experiences have forced me to develop many inner strengths.
- I’m glad I have developed strategies that helped me through tough times and that I can now use to help others.
- Ultimately, my crisis ended up giving me a new profession of psychotherapist and I’m glad about that.
- I’m glad I’ve been able to influence thousands of people and have found the purpose behind my crisis.
- I’m glad my washing machine overflowed because it made me clean the floor!
- Every friend, every movie I see, every little experience that makes me feel the gift of happiness make me feel glad every day.
How can you be unhappy, when you find something to be glad about, every moment by little moment? That’s the meaning of the gift of Happiness.
How can you be unhappy, when you find something to be glad about, every moment by little moment?
The important part of this philosophy is to realise we have a choice.
We can be gloomy or positive. We can retreat into a funk or pull ourselves out of it. Nobody’s saying it’s easy, least of all me, but we do have a choice. Yes or no. Yes I will try, no I’ll sit and feel sorry for myself.
That’s where the true gift of happiness lies. In all the little moments we can appreciate, instead of focusing on what we don’t have. And it’s in the little things, little moments, not big circumstances.
So, as we enter into a season that’s supposed to be about joyfulness and love, find ways to give yourself the gift of happiness, joyfulness and love. It takes practice. Start now and by the end of the year, in just one month, you’ll be amazed at how happy you can make yourself.
How to give yourself the gift you really want, the gift of happiness.
Start loving yourself. How? It’s not about buying presents. It’s about being gentle and kind to yourself. Treat yourself as you would a person you love. That’s the best way to attract love into your life anyway.
Stop criticisms that are not constructive. No insults or self-deprecation. Stop other people from taking advantage or abusing you.
Look after yourself as you would someone you love. Take rests when you need to, eat well, pamper yourself when you feel like it.
Play the Glad Game.
And have a very happy new year.
Have you found your own way to the gift of happiness, please share!
Would you like to find ways to be happier? Please contact me directly to arrange a convenient appointment time.
If you or someone you know would like a personal consultation, please call +61439 969 081.
Information only
Any information presented on our website is of a general nature only and is not intended as a substitute for professional advice.
Reproducing and Sharing
Jacquie Wise has many articles available for reprinting in your newsletter, website, social media or to pass on to your friends (including this post) that she would be happy for you to share. You can share a direct hyperlink to this post’s URL at anytime.
If you would like to reproduce any articles, Jacquie relies on your integrity to quote the content in its entirety and include the following acknowledgment at the end: © Jacquie Wise – Integrative Coach, Counsellor, Speaker, Trainer and Author, specialising in life, love, work and soul (www.wiseways.com.au)
